Comment 3 - Infidelity

In response to:
"In the United Kingdom monogamy is the law of the land. People, independant of their status or wealth, are allowed by law to marry only one person. In other parts of the world such as South Africa and some parts of the Middle East polygamy is allowed by law. Infidelity is therefore a culturally bound concept.
Infidelity has always been more acceptably committed by males than females. Many well known male figures, such as royals and politicians have been known to have mistresses. A good example of a high status male having a mistress is that of Prince Charles and Camilla Parker-Bowles. The list is however endless.
It only takes watching one show of Jeremy Kyle to find out that infidelity is just as prominent amongst most of society. This ITV website playing the 'catch-up' editions (http://www.itv.com/Lifestyle/jeremykyle/default.htm) have some prime examples of infidelity including:Friday 5th October 'Confess you're a cheat or I'll prove I'm the father of your eldest daughter' : Tuesday 2nd October 'I'll prove I didn't abort another man's baby - the results' amongst many others.
Monogamy in my opinion is a strange concept when we reduce our behaviour to our basic instinct which is to reproduce. Psychologists believe that it is in our nature to have several partners in order to make the most of our genes and produce the strongest, healthiest offspring. Monogamy therefore goes against our nature. Yet even though monogamy contradicts our whole nature people feel hurt and humiliated if their patner has been found to be unfaithful. Maybe this is due to modern day pressure to have the perfect home, with the 2.5 children, the perfect husband and the perfect wife. Maybe it's due to the unrealistic love stories constantly bombarding us from every single film we watch.
Infidelity has become a more open concept in modern society. This may be due to the increased ways in which people looking for other relationships can meet. One contreversial website openly offers married people the oppportunity to have an affair. (http://www.illicitencounters.com/?gclid=CIaJ79ichZICFQUWuwodH2jK2Q).
I'm not sure whether I see infidelity as a bad thing or just people following their natural instincts." http://beingbadjess02.blogspot.com/




My comment:
Do you not think that humans have evolved far beyond primal instincts? I find your comments interesting, and do agree with people, like psychologists, that it is in our nature to produce healthy, strong offspring. Having several partners obviously helps you change and develop and you can find the man that you believe will help you produce said offspring. However how does cheating on someone produce this? I do not feel that people are hurt and humiliated when their partner has been unfaithful due to modern day pressure to produce the perfect 2.5children. People are hurt and humiliated because they have been betrayed by the one that they loved and trusted. Monogamy is in our nature. it’s a basic, unspoken rule that exists among humans. When you love and trust someone you do not expect to be deceived, betrayed or mislead. You expect equality, love, affection and faithfulness and truthfulness. Love stories we watch on TV aren’t unrealistic, they just haven’t finished yet. We see the romantic parts, not the fights. But all relationships, even friendships come with both the good and the bad. Love isn’t unrealistic, it’s a feeling. You can’t cheat love, and I don’t believe you can cheat on your love. If someone cheated on you could you really put it down to their primal instinct and forget it? Or would your natural instinct to feel angry, cry, blame, hurt, lash out or hate take over?